in the bigger country

BRRRRRRR morning to everyone.

Central Illinois is a bit nippy this morning as here I sit with a cardigan and long underwear on. These last October days find me chilling, in more ways than one. I spent all of Sunday outdoors, I cleaned out sheds and hauled off garbage-burnt some papers in the burn barrel and caught a straw bale on fire...could have been those whipping winds. Thank goodness I was out there in time to dismantle the bale and put it out...or I wouldn't be having a farm sale, I'd be dealing with insurance adjusters. Oh my, not that!

Today, I am off from my "town" job...and with the outdoor work done, I have to attend to the indoor work. I loathe house keeping, I so look forward to the day when I have less house and more land. More utility and less utility bills- employing solar panels and wind energy- that's the plan I'm working on. Those steps taken for a bright future will cost me much in the beginning, I know- but in time those kind of changes should pay for themselves. So- from the ground up, in my new digs eventually- I will truly live the sustainable life I've always dreamed of.

My moving to Maine doesn't surprise many of the friends who know me by heart. Many have said they've always pictured me in the backwoods some day, chopping wood, whistling and happily working and wandering around in the bigger country. Flipping a kayak into the bed of the pickup, driving a few miles and flopping it out onto a lake. My kids and I will be visiting Maine soon again, as a family. I can't forecast fully what their reaction will be until we get there. At first, they'll be overcome by the beauty of it- the many trees and miles and miles of wilderness and water, but then I suspect, they'll wonder-Where's the movie theatre? Or the Pizza Hut? No McDonalds for fifty miles?!!! Ahhh, yes- I'll say, "This is heaven children...no McDonalds!" Then their openness to it all will slam shut like a door in the face of a religion salesman. So- I guess their picture of themselves in Maine will take some processing on their parts. The fast food thing might put a hitch in the focus for them.

Back to these last October days...the last of their kind for me, I reasoned yesterday. With that thought in mind, I wandered around even more intensely than usual. The sounds of the wind through my old trees, the barren golden fields of soybeans harvested. The long off views of deer crossing from hedge row to small woods sanctuary. The sunrises, the sunsets- those views will all be different for me this time next year. I vow to kayak often, the lake's length and breadth seem akin to my fields- the sun's last rays will be infinite over the water's rippling into bigger ripples all by a tip of my paddle into their liquid light. Not a bad trade off in my mind, though still- I know, I'll be comparing apples to oranges this time next year. Every day finds me making these comparisons, these opposites too. Preparing for change- like the seasons of one's life, ever bearing great circles. Be well, take care-