Thursday, December 31, 2009

courage and compost

"Well, we're living in the time of the compost pile. Almost everything is rotten, but the compost is where the good things grow." 
James Hubbell

James Hubbell is a poet, architect, a man with a vision of beauty- necessity.  I googled his name as I had recently read an article or rather an interview, I found his thoughts abundant and quite profound.  The quote above was seized immediately by me, copied and transferred here.  To my surprise, he is not quoted enough on the net.  One has to wade through "the between the lines" ocean of information to glean a view of this man's spirit.  Seems these days, as Mr. Hubbell so aptly
puts it, the compost pile is heaped with a rotten core- but as the pile heats up, I hope in the coming year, many will find the remnants to be worthy of mighty growth.
With that goes my attempt to put it in a wonder-full perspective.

2009 Compost 

Keep the faith, all else goes on the compost pile.

Add heat by remembering the joy of days gone by, of moments alive still in my veins and muscles, in my heart and very soul; those visions that made my eyes widen with wonder.

Add moisture by crying many tears, I tend to get mean when the waterworks aren't allowed to open up and cleanse the roughness of any given situation- I vow to cry more and curse less...

Add garbage, lots of garbage to the pile! For instance, past battles- fought and lost.  Past arguments- the ones where I knew I was right but would wrong another too deeply to have even mattered a pinch.  Past failures- super woman only exists in comic books,  simple woman does the best she can do with the tools she's acquired and even gets her cape a bit dirty in the end.  Past hurts- some I never saw coming and some I welcomed with open arms and then wondered, "why me?!"  Past mistakes- failure is like an iceburg to a tiny rowboat, one tip of the paddle in the wrong direction and your down in a titantic way...better to navigate in open seas, keeping one eye peeled for gigantic ice towers, and by all means- wearing a life vest that says SOS-Seek Only Solutions. 

Add grub...good food scraps, organically or sustainabley grown and most certainly local fare.  

Add yard waste and wood scraps- prune the matter that doesn't matter and pick up all the twigs, what doesn't root must be thrown on the pile so that other things might grow.

2010  Amendments

Take the good soil leftover from the compost heap and add seeds of-


I do believe with proper growing conditons, all that might add up to the most amazing garden.  One that I am very much looking forward to...

Again, I am compelled to ask you to remember... tattoo it if you must!!!-

Fear Accomplishes Nothing

(Just look back over the last year, when you accomplished a feat- perhaps losing 10 pounds. Was it fear that got you walking every day, or was it hope?  How about when you had to confront a significant other with a problem?  Was it fear that made you take the bull by the horns and stand your ground or was it the courage that it took to stand up, knees shaky as ever- to confront the problem, thereby clearing the air so understanding could float on down clear as day to all eyes concerned?  When I speak of fear in this way, I do not mean herculean feats, I mean every-day-all-your-life, getting-on-that-two-wheeler-after-the-training-wheels-were-removed-bicycle and hoping with everything you had- that you might actually gain balance and ride.  Was it fear that turned the pedals?  Or was it faith?)

Thank you for giving a darn, listening and remembering together- as a child we remember the darkness of a closet as a fearful thing, as adults- fear all too often is let out of the closet to inhabit the whole house.  I hope to become like the fearless child I once was, many years ago- she will be the compost queen once again, riding, peddling like the courageous being she always intended to be.  Happy New Year to the courageous compost building children that we were...and can be again.

Take care.


Jane said...

Very well written, as always, and an enjoyable post. Happy New Year to you!


Jayne said...

Brilliant my friend... just brilliant. I am smiling as I send you sincere wishes for a very beautiful and Happy New Year. :c)

bam said...

dear darlin, well isn't this a new year treat. didn't know you were back in the typin business. hadn't checked in a while, but oh i just did...........that picture of the lighthouse in the snow made my heart practically stop it was so beautiful, and the bedsheet sign....oh my. the layers of meaning for this particular reader are astounding.......what if i hadn't driven those two hours down the highway? what if i hadn't pulled up to the charmingest farm, with the loveliest farmer? what if i hadn't sopped up every word of that story, that heart-breaking/mending story, and put it in the paper that somehow traveled all the way to maine? would someone tell me how that paper got into his hands in maine. tell me once again for it is a story with pure illogic, and pure magic. and there you are, and here we are. and it's maine now you see out your window. it's maine whose snows fall on your shoulders, your eyelashes. it's maine whose sunsets you watch glide into the ocean, or maybe that's where they arise from.....anyway, happy new year beautiful gorgeous true.....i send love, and glorious beginnings as we all begin again.....

truewonder said...

It's snowing here, showers they call them-I'd say! Still and beautiful, pinching myself, sometimes wrestling too...with the "I'm here, what's next"- but I want to go back sometimes too, ding ding ding, when's that bell gonna ring-Round 12!
Dear ladies, thank you- a new year, a new day, to begin it again...and Miss Bam, I know- it is hard to believe yet I am living it, feeling it, moving it around and around (my cabin in the woods is still unoccupiable, pardon my making up the lingo as I go along...)so, the nest of the Big Fish is being renovated, decluttered,spiced up and then some. From a 4 bedroom Farm house to a workshop with a loft...if I don't find what I'm made of in the open ended vastness of Maine, maybe this little space will squeeeeeeze it out of me!
Always Bam, you gave me the torch- passed it on like the wonderful wonder that you are...much love. Come to Maine...come to Maine...breakin' and mendin' done daily, pure pristine magic.

walk2write said...

Your beautiful (com)post gave me the message I needed this morning and opened my eyes to something I didn't want to acknowledge. Thank you. After reading a few of your posts, I'm beginning to like Maine even though I hate the cold.